GOALS!

I have a long list of goals, like finishing my Master's, getting a teaching job, learning how to cake decorate..

But one of my goals that I have to constantly work on right now is my weight loss goal. I know I've mentioned it before, but I recently got inspired so I'm going to stick to my guns! Especially since my and James' birthday is soon and our anniversary is coming up after that and I want to look pretty in pictures and in dresses! Anyway, this is one way of keeping me accountable.

I'll be updating as I go, so let's hope a true transformation will begin!

Interesting read

I am reading the most interesting book about the legacy of divorce. Basically, how divorce affects the children and the future. It's a longitudinal study that has been going on for 25 years. The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce: The 25 Year Landmark Study reads like a novel. Very informative and shocking!

Hoarse baby

I'm concerned about my boy. I don't think he's been crying more than usual, but his bedtimes are getting more and more difficult. As a result, I think he's losing his voice. He doesn't have any cold symptoms or anything indicating that he's sick. So he's just got a hoarse voice. I feel awful. I miss his cooing.. If it doesn't get better in a day or two, I may call the doctor.

Marriage

Don't take this as a bad post. It's just me venting about what I think marriage should be. Believe me, I love my husband and he's doing such a wonderful job. I couldn't ask for a better man. I have a lot of faith in our love and marriage because of our foundation.

My parents have rules since being married and James and I have adapted them as our own. A lot of it comes from observation, and the fact that it helps our marriage. These are a list of our own rules and we're pretty good at following them.

1) Never talk to a member of the opposite sex about marital problems. It's okay to talk to family, that's a given. But I would never find it appropriate to talk to a guy about my problems with James. Just sets up for a bad situation.

2) Never go to bed angry. This is based off the biblical verse to not let the sun set on your fury. And I agree with that. There have been nights where James and I would be up for hours, just talking and trying to resolve whatever is going on. Plus, when you fall asleep angry, you just start your day angry and that's never a good thing.

3) Always sleep in the same bed. This was a huge observation based on divorce parents. As long as you're constantly there with your problem, you have to face it and deal with it. It's always better to deal with it and resolve it than sleep in another room and avoid it.

4) Never storm out during a fight. Walking out is always a bad thing. It usually makes things worse. I found that it just makes James even angrier with me because it gets the public involved.

5) Never fight in public. Stems from the storming off rule, it would be embarrassing for us to fight in public.

6) Don't use the "D" word. The word "divorce" is poison. How can you expect to stay with someone forever if all you say is that you want a divorce?

We're not perfect. We don't follow the rules all the time. But to make sure that there isn't more complications to it, these are our rules. We love each other and that's what a marriage is truly based on.

Fun Foto Friday!

I love how my hair is a mess! Gotta love my new coffee mug!

Taking the big plunge!

Well, I applied for graduate school. And to be honest, I'm scared out of my mind! I applied for my Master's in Secondary Education with a focus in Math. I really believe that I'm going to be a student for life! I do want to start working, the education field has always been intriguing to me. Just a few things I have to think about:

• How soon will I start to teach after I get my degree?
• What about Alex? Should I wait till he's in preschool?
• When I get pregnant with my second child, will I take a break or just continue working?

Ideally I would teach fairly quickly and Alex can go into daycare. I would tell myself that it wouldn't be too bad since a teacher's schedule is no where near as demanding as any other job. Plus, I would get summers off and once Alex starts school, we'd both be on the same schedule. I want to be around for those precious moments but I also feel the desire to work. I'm really torn. I keep thinking that if we were in Albuquerque, I would go ahead and start working and leave Alex with my mom.

I also think about maybe just getting my Master's for right now and then get another Master's in school counseling later, and when our kids are in school, I can go to work. I'm unsure. I love staying at home with Alex, but with the current job situation, I feel that James and I should have some sort of a back up plan.

I wish this could be easier. I wish that we were closer to my family and if we had to put Alex in daycare, he could stay with my mom and it would make my choices easier. I'm not sure where my dilemma is. Is it the fact that I might be leaving Alex? Or that I don't want to put him in a daycare? Would I want to put him in one? What if I don't like being away from him? What about if we have another child? So many choices.. So much to decide..

Motivation?

I have tons of laundry to do. I need to clean out our bedroom.. I still have this big to do list and not a lot of it is getting done! I just wish I could hire a maid and have her do it all for me! Plus, Alex is being a real handful lately. I try my best to play with him and clean during his nap times. But I think he's teething, so he's been really fussy. Well, we're going to Albuquerque this week, so maybe thinking of that will get my butt into gear..